


Dreaming of Dragoon

by Azile_Teacup



Category: Merlin (TV)
Genre: Community: kinkme_merlin, M/M, Magic Revealed
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-09-21
Updated: 2012-09-21
Packaged: 2017-11-14 18:07:50
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,944
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/518060
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Azile_Teacup/pseuds/Azile_Teacup
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Written for a kink meme prompt which I can't actually find right now. Basically Arthur recognises Dragoon because he has spent hour imagining growing old with Merlin.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Dreaming of Dragoon

"I really wouldn't DO THAT if I were you because if you DO THAT..........you will never learn of my plan"  
"What plan?"  
"Exactly, that's why you can't run me through!!"  
Arthur lowers his sword. He really can't run the man through, his Father enjoys the act passing judgement and the public humiliation of execution too much for it to be worth it. But that's not why Arthur lowers his sword. There's something about this old man. The way he cocks his head, his insolence. Something about the way he talks, his eyes.

“Have we met?”

Arthur looks closer at the eyes.

“No, I don't think so. I never forget a face.”

“Your eyes, we've met somewhere before.”

Definitely familiar.

“Me? No!”

Merlin! Arthur realises who this guy reminds him of and he stops paying attention. Which it turns out is a bad idea; next thing he knows there's something heavy hitting him in the head and the man is off. Arthur calls for the guards.

Later, watching Dragoon the Great talking, walking, standing, sitting in the cell Arthur realises it's more than a resemblance to Merlin, it's how Arthur's always imagined an aged Merlin would look like. He's spent hours working out how they could grow old together, side by side. 

Merlin is always there at Arthur's back, always there to comfort or advise. Sometimes they fall into bed together, adrenaline and proximity making it inevitable, and Arthur imagines Merlin whispering nice things in his ear, imagines those hands that grasp frantically, gentler and calmer. Loving. He closes his eyes and pretends this is happening from affection not desperation. He falls asleep pretending Merlin will still be there when he wakes. And he dreams.

He dreams of them. Of Merlin and his books, researching each new threat and advising Arthur and his knights. Of Merlin riding out at his side, sweeping after him through Camelot to greet visiting dignitaries. Over time, Merlin starts to be richly clothed and well fed. In Arthur's dreams they both age, growing into themselves and then back out again.

So when he watches Dragoon, he sees Merlin. He isn't sure Dragoon actually is Merlin, maybe just someone very like him. When Dragoon starts in on servants Arthur has listened to Merlin's mutterings far too many times not to recognise them, but other people must feel so. It isn't until he's searched everywhere (even the tavern as Gaius had suggested) that he's certain.

Arthur sits, trying not to give away his shock. He's helped by the insults being thrown at him as he can pretend anything is a reaction to that. As soon as he can he makes his escape, shutting himself in his rooms. 

Merlin is Dragoon, Dragoon is Merlin. And Dragoon is a sorcerer. Arthur has often been accused of being a bit dim, a little bit unobservant, but even he cannot miss the implications here. He sits in his chair and thinks.

He puts Merlin out of his mind, for now. He thinks back on every Sorcerer he has watched die at his Father's bidding. He remembers his first burning, standing by his Father at barely nine years old. He remembers screaming, the same smell that comes from the kitchens when they're roasting and someone accidentally over cooks the meat, but far worse. He remembers the times the smoke blew into his face and he was forced to breath that stench. 

Arthur tries to put the deaths out of his mind. They broke the law, the punishment was execution. Of that he was certain. Every man, woman and child living under the king had to obey his laws, that is what lead to justice and a fair rule. It was justice and fairness that lead to people's contentedness, happiness and a better work ethic, better harvests. A good kingdom. 

It wasn't the breaking of the law he had to wonder about. So he set to thinking about how laws were made. There were decrees by the king, big things that Uther would spend hours going over before announcing. It was the council that advised him on this. Ultimately it was the king who set the laws, the king who decided for the good of the kingdom. He'd known his Father to be wrong before, but this was different.

This was the foundation of Camelot, it was a belief fostered in him his whole life not just a law. He knew magic was evil for it had killed his Mother. Arthur thought further, remembered all the times he had fought magic and Sorcerers. 

He remembered most clearly the Druid girl who turned into a creature, a cat with wings, that had beset the kingdom when Merlin was still fairly new (Arthur marked his days by Merlin recently). It was Merlin who made this a memorable fight. Arthur had been busy, but he'd noticed that his man servant was away a lot. Then there had been the mystery of his vanishing food and Merlin's cheerful mood. He'd deduced a girl, mostly from the fact that Gaius didn't seem to know where Merlin had vanished to. Gaius had come up with something, maybe errands, but Arthur knew him well enough to see the lie. Merlin had been there when Arthur wounded it, but taken off before he could be questioned. There was also Halig's certainty Merlin was involved in the disappearance of the Druid girl.

Now, knowing Merlin was a sorcerer, Arthur was certain Merlin had known the girl. He'd been so sad after that, frowning into Arthur's boots or other chores. The girl had been so small. Arthur remembered feeling sick, having to cater to Halig. And then he'd seen her, cornered by his knights. One small girl. It had taken everything in him not to back off. It had taken the knowledge that his Father would suspect sorcery and demand ever more punishing searches, possibly arrests, to let him kill her. He'd had to think very hard about the innocents, the lives he'd sworn to protect, to keep him from running, calling his men off and running.

Arthur shook himself. He'd seen, since he was small, acts of magic that were kindnesses, not evils. He knew there was good and bad in everything, even sorcery. The question was, could he bend the law? The law he'd sworn to uphold, to protect, in order for the kingdom to be good and prosperous. He had done it before. He'd helped the Druid boy, Mordred, escape. He'd even gone so far as to swear to Morgana he'd not kill Mordred if he ever met him again. He'd been willing to let Gwen off, that time they'd suspected her of curing her Father. Then, and most compelling, there was his nurse maid.

He'd only been four, perhaps five at most. Uther always forbade his carers from being too open or affectionate as affection was weakness. Arthur was not allowed the weakness, even as a child. But this one was different. Her name had been Helen and she'd let Arthur sit in her lap, let him give her little kisses and give him hugs. She'd tucked him into bed each night, a giant monstrous thing with heavy curtains that hid shadows. He used to be frightened of them and one day Helen had taken him to bed early and drawn the shadows out. She'd made them into misshapen animals and made them come, warily and afraid, to say hello to Arthur. After that he'd always seen animals and he'd talk to them as he was falling asleep.

Looking back, Helen had probably done a lot of magic that had seemed every day at the time. He remembered pictures in the air with his stories, animals coming up unafraid, perfectly mended clothes. His food had always been warm and inviting, even if the taste wasn't brilliant. Uther had executed her of course. Arthur would have bent any law to keep Helen safe.

Next Arthur had to think as if it wasn't sorcery. Sorcery had all sorts of complications and connotations. He needed to imagine if it were any other law, would his Father bend it to keep someone safe? He thought of tithes and remembered an old farmer. Arthur had been eleven at the time, riding out with his Father to visit their lands. They'd come to a farm and Uther had been happy to see the man who owned the land. They seemed to know one another. Arthur watched them, seeing friendship of a kind. They had eaten well and slept well that night. Later that same year the farmer had been dragged before Uther for refusing to pay the tithe. He had explained about a sick child and worried mother. Arthur didn't remember exactly. He did remember the king granting pardon and releasing the farmer.

There had also been the case of Lancelot. His Father had agreed to pardon him, had agreed to consider knighting him even, breaking the first oath. He'd admitted to being wrong about executing Gwen's Father. Arthur was certain now that if a law did not involve sorcery, Uther would consider bending it stubborn as he was. This was mercy. 

Mercy was something Arthur wanted in his reign above all else. He wanted to be kept grounded, to listen to his people and to forgive their human natures. He wanted fault to be punished, but then forgiven. He wanted the punishment to fit the crime. 

Arthur knew Merlin was a sorcerer, knew he'd broken the laws of Camelot, but he would be forgiven. The king would not allow forgiveness, and he would be wrong. This time, Arthur had to exercise his own judgement if he wanted Merlin, and sorcery, to be part of his kingdom. He would keep Merlin's secret.

His Father has ordered Dragoon executed, though. Arthur hides his sadness but cannot stop the note of hope when Merlin tells them to 

“Wait.”

But then it's only the say

“There are other crimes to which I wish to confess.”

and Arthur cannot help but be derisive of this idea. Even if he is some great sorcerer Merlin's still a bit of an idiot.

When Merlin pushes Gaius Arthur is afraid of him for the first time. He's seen dying men do desperate things and Merlin has power right now and a chance of escape. Even good men sometimes cause great harm trying to survive. Arthur's relieved when all that happens is the bonfire going up. He gives chase, stalling as much as he can. He's worked out why Merlin is old; Gwen is very dear to them both (and a big part of Arthur's plans for growing old with Merlin. She knows of Arthur's feelings for him, would be willing to allow him his consort if he allows her Lancelot, should he return. They've grown close, plotting to rule and still have love. A kiss here and there is good practice, and time with Gwen really is rewarding these days). He still can't work out why Merlin isn't back, though.

When it's Merlin they catch, not Dragoon, Arthur is relieved. He notices the clothes behind Merlin's back and knows the knights cannot miss them either. Nor the way Merlin is grimacing and twisting his neck and lips. There are too many clues, so Arthur rambles about the tavern and gives orders. 

He has decided to let Merlin have this secret, to let him hide it from Arthur. He wants Merlin's trust and will just have to work on that it until Merlin tells him of his own accord. When that happens he'll tell Merlin his own secret. Up to that time he will dream of Dragoon.


End file.
